Jesus calls certain souls to night vigil. Adoration at night is a special calling that will bestow added grace because it is a sacrificial love akin to fasting. The beloved must give up something cherished in an act of love for Christ. It can be food, or in the case of night vigil, or adoration at night, it is sleep.
Night Vigil with Jesus to Bring Deliverance
I had a night vigil today with Jesus. Adoration at night is a form of prayer of sacrifice much like prayer and fasting.
I was led to do this after an irresistible 9 day novena to Our Lady of Sorrows. This novena showed me both my greatest defect and a hidden mystery; I understood my solution would come through adoration at night. The novena has blessed me greatly; I see how much Jesus loves me. I feel He is present to me. I also see how I have failed to do His will.
A week ago I was called by the Lord to help a family member. I felt He wanted me to be Christ to this person in a tangible way. I was convinced of this, and I knew He desired a healing to come.
Hidden Mystery Revealed
Before doing the irresistible novena I did not understand something about myself. The Lord showed me last Thursday, very tangibly something that I had not known about myself. It was the day I learned of my greatest defect, laughably so, might I add. Quite literally, and painfully, to be exact about it.
This story would be long to tell. I will only say it involved an animal, and my suffering was very long in duration. The animal was clearly a hindrance to my work helping the person I came to help.
My initial reaction was to be passive. I wanted to stop the aggressive behaviors of that animal. The animal was nearly always provoked at the exact moment I wanted to talk about Jesus. I needed to share how He had helped me in my own similar suffering. But the animal was persistent and would always begin the attack at the perfect time.
I was so stressed out at the moment that I did not pay close attention to this pattern. It took all my patience to resist retaliating against the animal, who by this time was actually hurting me physically. This reminded me of another experience in my life where temperance was needed and the Lord was teaching me that virtue.
Signal Graces Come in Night Vigil
On Saturday, after Mass, I attended a meeting on adoration. A speaker shared a testimony on Jesus in the Eucharist and the spiritual benefits of adoration at night. I knew my greatest defect. And now, I am nudged of the hidden mystery for getting rid of it. Is it true, I wondered, that my greatest defect, my passivity and docility in the face of evil, can be overcome through the grace of regular night vigil?
Before the lockdowns in 2020 I adored weekly in the night, at 10 pm. It wasn’t much of a sacrifice. But usually at that hour there were few who would come and sit with Jesus, so I was spoiled to be alone with Him. I often talked freely without distraction. It was a beautiful time.
After the lecture I approached the speaker. I asked if this person knew about spiritual warfare at all and if night adoration was particularly efficacious. I mentioned I was in the middle of the 7 Sorrows novena and my problem of passivity. I knew it was my weakness. The person smiled, then reached into a pocket and lifted out a rosary of the 7 sorrows.
We laughed. It was a signal grace. I said, do you always carry a rosary of the seven sorrows? Are you praying a novena too? The person laughed again. Said no. Said, “I was nudged to put it in my pocket as I was walking out the door on the way to Mass.”
The Hidden Inner Life
of Adoration at Night
This is the hidden life of an adorer of Christ. This is the life of one who relies on Mary, the Mother of God, to intercede and lead us to her Son, Jesus. It is a life of signal graces and little daily miracles. In the midst of my confusion and my fear I found perfect joy in Christ at that moment. I belly laughed heartily.
We all have fears, and sometimes the evil one will use a creature to invoke in us fear. Fear does not come from God. This is why in scripture Jesus repeatedly said, “Do not fear.” Fear will stop us from being the hands and feet of Christ. Truly, the evil one does not wish for me to show charity to my family member in need. I had such fear of the animal I did not desire to return. But return I must with Jesus leading the way.
The Lord is saying to me, “Come. Do the work. Do not fear. I am with you. Speak with authority over the animal. Tell the evil: ‘Be Gone.’ Do you trust Me? When I enter into the home through you, the demons will flee. Command it in My name.”
3 AM is the Hour of Power
Before bed last night I prayed to the Virgin Mary and asked her to wake me up for night vigil. At 3 am, I awoke. Obediently I arose and dressed and left for chapel. I prayed to the Lord as I drove, and adored Him for one hour.
My heart is open wide during adoration at night. After all my experiences during the week, here I can kneel before Jesus in complete surrender and peace. I love to contemplate His love and mercy. He is so good. His love is so beautiful and my soul is aware how intimately He knows and loves me. I’m just a fallen creature with so many flaws, fears, and inabilities.
During my visit that night, I asked Him for the grace to return again and face the animal. I was afraid. But this time I chose to go with faith and confidence in Jesus to direct me, and help me overcome my fear and passivity. On my own, I can do nothing. He showed my heart that my willingness to return is a gift of charity that comes from Him. I must be grafted to Him and do the work He wills me to do.
He led me to a page in In Sinu Jesu while I adored Him in silence. This is what it said:
"Trust in Me and continue to adore Me. Remain in My company and I will work things beyond your imagining. Follow the indications of My providence as you perceive them, and trust more in Me and My love for you than in Yourself."
The Virgin Mary's Role
I am grateful to the Virgin Mary for her intercession and for bringing me to divine truth about myself and helping me grow closer to Jesus. I am also grateful for the signal graces she leaves her children when we are obedient to God and seeking His will in our lives. I will continue the night vigil with Jesus each week.
Adoration at night has really blessed me. I know that Jesus is with me and I trust in Him above all else. If He is calling me to night vigil it is for a greater spiritual purpose. Who am I to say I’m unwilling to sacrifice a little sleep? I must do as He says and trust in Him more than in myself.
And do you want to know something? The Virgin Mary woke me at the perfect time. Exactly one hour after my arrival a woman arrived to adore Jesus. When we surrender all and give our lives, totus tuus, our very lives become a beautiful journey on the heels of God. We find ourselves following along in childlike wonder at what the next signal grace might be.
I could not know when the next adorer would come. But He knew what time I should come and when His next adorer would arrive. His amazing love and presence has changed me. He will change your soul, too, if you let Him. Who wouldn’t want to live like this?
3 Responses
So beautiful.
Thank you for writing this and sharing. Very beautiful and inspiring story.
Am heavenly blessed to in your blessed presence of Jesus am blessed